Thursday, March 29, 2007

Peace in Iraq for a few billion more...

While Bush is asking for over $100 billion to further his war efforts (I'm waiting for them to rename the defence department "The Ministry of Peace") I have a suggestion that will only cost a few billion, probably less than their original $6 billion invasion plan.

I say they just go into each town of Iraq and seize, destroy, crush, shred and otherwise remove from the streets every single damned car in the country. The result will be no more freakin' car bombs and more people getting on the streets and getting to know each other. Anyone driving a car is either a terrorist or a soldier - that should make things a bit easier then.

I mean, just how many cars are there in Iraq and how much could they be worth after almost years of war? I'm sure there aren't too many shiny new SUVs except for the ones the occupying powers brought with them - everything else, even if its a few million cars could be taken off the road for a few thousand dollars each - more money than most of the owners will have seen in a long time. That would be a total of billions - even if its tens of billions its still far less than Bush is spending - remember the bare minimum the Iraq war has cost is $500 billion, more realistic estimates are closer to $1 trillion - over $3,000 each per man woman and child in the US (or more than ten times as much per Irai!). Just after the initial invasion I read that US forces were at one point going around with trucks of money at one point compensating families of civilian casualties with a few thousand each, maybe $10,000 if they were lucky, so by comparison buying cars is a good deal.

Okay I admit as Palestine has shown there's plenty of opportunity for suicide bombers to wreck havoc without a car - but you know there's no more chick'n shit leaving a car full of explosives at a market and walking away stuff. You've really got to believe that those 40 virgins are waiting for you in paradise to blow yourself up for it. Or you could just take Uncle Sam's money and buy yourself a nice triple venti latte and enjoy the rest of the day watching TV and drinking beer.

Of course the car companies would never allow systematic genocide of automobiles - even though it would basically be a big subsidy for them since eventually all those people, when peace had broken out, would want to by shiny new gas guzzlers. Hey for a few billion more you could get them all a nice new fuel efficient Prius or heck a bunch of solar panels and some electric cars. What kind of nice utopian paradise would that be - maybe they could send a few virgins over there for paradise on earth, actually if some theories are to be believed all they need are some white raisins. Who'd have thought you could get peace, love and paradise on earth for a few billion and a truck load of raisins...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'm from China. I found your blog in a very occasional surfing. Your blog is very interesting. But the update seems slow in 07. I'll come again when you have new posts. Thanks!

0101010 said...

Thanks for reading and the comment - yes it has been sloooow this year but that's what they invented blog readers for right? I recommend Bloglines and Google Reader, they seem to work well.